[When I was in high school a group of us guys had this notebook which we called The Book of Things Written Down Part Zero. It was a book in which things were written down, and the less sense they made the better. I recently unearthed this notebook in some of my old school stuff and found the following nonsense love poem I had all but forgotten about. I feel I should disclaim that this was never about anyone in particular. I wasn’t being mean. I was just being weird.]
My love is like a green green rose,
Her eyes as black as fire.
Her gentle voice makes me suppose
There’s fishies in the mire.
Her laugh is like a bubbling brook
All brown with sewage waste.
My heart doth melt at her sweet look,
She doth like chicken taste.
Her smile is bright as noonday sun,
Her hair as gold as honey.
But you know, she weighs a ton,
And her nose looks kind of funny.