One of these days I am going to die. It’s a sad reality, and I’m not the kind to dwell on it, at least not any more, but it’s something we all have to face. But I am going to say this, and I am going to say it only once: If anyone puts an “I Roll in Memory of Albert Berg” sticker in the back window of their car/truck/whatever I will personally start the zombie uprising from beyond the grave. Your brain will be the first on our zombie menu of delicacies.
Every time I see one of these things I think, “Really? That’s the legacy you think that person wanted? A trite message written in peeling letters on the back of your Hyundai?”
If you want to honor me how about a nice gravestone with the inscription “All That You Love Will Be Carried Away” in Copperplate Gothic Light font. Either that or “Eadem Mutata Resurgo” under a nautilus spiral. Either one would be equally cool.
And speaking of which, whatever happened to gravestone inscriptions anyway? All I see when I walk through the cemeteries these days is a name and two dates. If you’re going to be dead you might as well make your final resting place at least a little epic. When someone looks at my headstone I want them to think, “Now that must have been an interesting dude.”
Addendum: A quick Google search of the phrase “I roll in memory of” produced no relevant hits. Is this a local thing? Because I see it all the time when I’m driving. Man, now I feel bad for living in such a dump of a town.